A Response to “Life’s Instructions”

I recently came across a list of “life’s Instructions” some of them had merit, but I did not agree with all of them.  Below is my response to each of these: My responses are the blues.  obviously

  1. Have a firm handshake. True
  2. Look people in the eye. Also very important
  3. Sing in the shower. I see no merit in this what so ever
  4. Own a great stereo system. Unless you live in an apartment with thin walls
  5. If in a fight, hit first and hit hard. And cheat to win
  6. Keep secrets. Are we keeping secrets from people, or keeping our own dirty secrets?
  7. Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday. And a sucker is born every minute
  8. Always accept an outstretched hand. What if that outstretched hand wants to pull you over a cliff?  What if its a villain you just battled and is now hanging off the edge of a building?  What if a loan shark is trying to help you pay debts?
  9. Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference. Some people can tell the difference though.  Its called “calling someones bluff”
  10. Whistle. especially when trying to look innocent
  11. Avoid sarcastic remarks. I wholeheartedly disagree with this. Sarcastic comments are hilarious.  And if you don’t let people know when they are wrong, how will they ever be right? 
  12. Choose your life’s mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 per cent of all your happiness or misery. 90% seems very high,  seems like someone might be a little clingy 
  13. Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out. Nice thought, but i can’t say many people follow it, how often do you hear about “large anonymous donations” or “mystery person saves day” plus, why not get rewarded for good deeds
  14. Lend only those books you never care to see again.  …So, all books?
  15. Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that they have. Just let them live in a fantasy land, and instead of possibly working towards other goals, let them waste time on something that will not happen, sounds like what you do to people you don’t like.
  16. When playing games with ! children, let them win. This is why kids are so soft now a days.  Every ones a winner! NO! Kids need to learn that they have to work to win, everything isn’t handed to them.  Plus, who gets satisfaction out of having victory handed to you?  It feels much better to earn a win.
  17. Give people a second chance, but not a third. Baseball would be very different if this was the case
  18. Be romantic. There is a fine line between romance and stalking
  19. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know. Don’t be that person, no one likes that person.  Sometimes a situation just sucks
  20. Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life-and-death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems. Agreed
  21. Don’t allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It’s there for our convenience, not the caller’s. fair statement
  22. Be a good loser.  False.  why would you want to be good at losing.  a better option is be a good sport, but who wants to say they are a good loser.  you know how you become good at something?  Practice and repetition, so to become a good loser you lose often.
  23. Be a good winner.  agree
  24. Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret. Earlier this list suggests keeping secrets, but if your friend followed this rule, you wouldn’t have to keep the secret…
  25. When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go. Awkwardly long hugs may result from multiple people following this one.
  26. Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born. Truth
  27. Keep it simple. KISS:  Keep It Simple, Stupid.
  28. Beware of the person who has nothing to lose. And everything to gain, it looks like things are looking up for them.
  29. Don’t burn bridges. You’ll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river. Or don’t rely on others and learn to swim
  30. Live your life so that your epitaph could read, No Regrets. I think someone who lives by “no regrets”  Often has many.
  31. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on life, you’ll regret the things you didn’t do more than the one’s you did. Debatable, I don’t regret not robbing banks, not scarring my hockey number into my arm, ect.
  32. Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them. ok
  33. Remember no one makes it alone. Have a grateful heart and be quick to acknowledge those who helped you. Recently it seems that God has been helping a lot of movie stars and singers/rappers, and they do make sure to thank him
  34. Take charge of your attitude. Don’t let someone else choose it for you.  meh
  35. Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes. But man, is it ever hard to find a nice way to leave.  good luck making a short trip
  36. Begin each day with some of your favorite music. sure
  37. Once in a while, take the scenic route. sounds fine
  38. Send a lot of Valentine cards. Sign them, ‘Someone who thinks you’re terrific.’ who still sends valentine cards?
  39. Answer the phone with enthusiasm and energy in your voice. With caller ID I know who’s calling and can answer the phone with the appropriate amount of energy. 
  40. Keep a note pad and pencil on your bed-side table. Million-dollar ideas sometimes strike at 3 a.m. Like a bed with a note bad and pen attached to it!
  41. Show respect for everyone who works for a living, regardless of how trivial their job. So even if they are a complete prick and disrespectful you need to respect them just because they have a job?
  42. Send your loved ones flowers. Think of a reason later. thoughtful
  43. Make someone’s day by paying the toll for the person in the car behind you. If this is all it takes to make your day then your day sucks.
  44. Become someone’s hero. Kinda weird to actively try to do that.
  45. Marry only for love. Seems obvious
  46. Count your blessings. k
  47. Compliment the meal when you’re a guest in someone’s home. No, then they are going to serve it again to someone else, and you are doing that next person a great disservice.  To know of evil and do nothing to stop it is just as bad as those doing the evil.
  48. Wave at the children on a school bus. Don’t.  haven’t you ever seen to catch a predator?
  49. Remember that 80 per cent of the success in any job is based on your ability to deal with people. Seems made up
  50. Don’t expect life to be fair. Really ending on a strong one here… :-/


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2 responses to “A Response to “Life’s Instructions”

  1. Awesome responses buddy, funny shit haha 🙂

  2. Reblogged this on Mackin Says and commented:
    A humorous and truthful view of each of the life’s instructions from my great friend, Mr. Dr. Perry.

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